lost charm

So many girls swagger around as they are on a podium for a fashion show, cold beauties, with the same glasses, the same pants and the same stance, desperate for attention (and so feebly get superficial worth to how they show themselves superficially), but grace can't be learnt, one must free himself of the material, the image, the projection, let that body move freely out of conventions, fears, masks and pride. It's a shame that the ones the most graceful are those feeling the most uneasy with their appearance, as a desire to be simple, to simply be, they stay discreet, without disguise but feeling ugly for that simpleness and grace;

Society says be in that mold, cold and beautiful, thanks to plethora of products, while i'm thinking : grace is a supreme attraction for me, natural and simplicity attracts its peers. Fake, unatural, exaggerated sophistication goes along with the same.

I feel to be humble and true.

Before, not so long ago (for now)

I used to be, to sound, to think a bit like this guy, i see now, everywhere in the things i check (books, films, comic strips, on the net, in the streets, with friends, whatever...), i see now all the devious reasonnings, all the hidden fears, the judgmental mind, filling the characters, and people, hurting them, making them reactive and defensive, depriving them of being real in the moment, soon i'll be able to see it in myself before it happens and so keep on looking to the positive of life always, keep the peace, the joy and love inside me, feel the stillness of my respectful being, my philosophy is getting clearer, i'll refine it continuously.

Presence

There is such a big sense of waste, i've got in me that i have to awake for a long time now, that's how i was rebellious against the common unconsciousness we all grow in, but that started to glow in me at a very early age, that need to be born to my real self, that's why i feel, felt attacked, threatened in my quest by that deceitful environment, i never bent, i never surrendered, and that was a suffering for many years because i compared, i opposed that being, a screaming voice inside, to what was happening all around me, all over the world, and from  that comes the clash, though it seems so obvious now, what do i need, what's really important to feel as one, simply to let the consciousness of who i am, be, and inhabit fully my body, we don't need what's outside to be true, what we get from outside is only practical knowledge, informations, culture, that doesn't define who we are, because who we are is inside us from the day we're born, we just have to let it be, live, shine, thrive, whatever, all we need to act, to have a good time on earth, is already inside all of us.
Competition, comparison only leads to conflicts, and no one wants to live in fear, so just be real.

(For some i will sound like a guru, they won't understand, maybe those aren't just ready to awaken to themselves, tragically maybe it will never happen, but deep down everyone wants to be free of fears, and live in love and respect)

It's not because i'm not saying that i'm not feeling.

I'm pretty sure now!

Writting is a palliative for us unable to reveal or reach for an instant need, and it's working so well because people just want to dream that much, they fear the present of their own selves, not seeing that they can do what is good for themselves and they can enjoy what is around and inside them.

Tag on roughed up Dignity

The girl stood in front of me on tip toe, making herlself taller, watching me down with a smirk, yes i was slender, i had curly hair longer than yours, call me that girl name, hammer hard the mischievous mistake, astray i'm blushing for your cheek is against mine, your breath under my nose, they teased, they asked me to get close, enjoying my distress to their drive, poke at me for i had the thinness and shy shine blazing their jealousy, desired to play kiss then desired to compare the boy i was to that lively girl, one piece of advice i got, be indifferent!, let the cruel girls get tired of their reluctance to love!, i say now you adviser get of my back and choke in your mean warning, everyone, hate me or love me, come back and mock me to assess the filthy human is born, quite not right, thirty for bruises and sweat, recognition is an universal savior, just don't make me a disolving cloud too far high for your indulging glance.

Hate me or love me, respectfully! Let me keep my dignity. Or i'm going to take it on your ugly unread flesh.

Because I,
love you all!
Humanity my bully.

(It's better to be tolerant because there's one thing we all want. Indifference is the worst.)

"To every comprehension about something, there is, sooner or later, an action..."

The projection Problem

can someone love himself if he can't get rid of the hatred for others?

picture that

I'm a dead crow with a sun consuming heart.

(crow,   

       sun)

You is never me, i put all my madness to rise over this but tonight i feel it's a despicable drama. I'm never the one, chosen, designated by "you". The special, the unique, You, the craved end, that someone burns to possess.

I made it my choice?!, my path, my shield,
i made me disposable. Flirting, close to waste.

locate oneself in one's knowledge

"The question isn't to notice firstly the knowledge of others but to think about the situations, the projects, the resources who will allow each one to pinpoint his knowledge and to find oneself in, to picture oneself in, to have awareness of one's identity; to understand in it what was destructive or constructive, facilitated or made out difficult, what is active knowledge or passive knowledge, what is used without knowing or unused knowledge, what is still to learn, what one doesn't want to learn, what is needed, what will be useful to know, what can be find by cooperation, what can be embellished, enhanced, what is giving birth to oneself day to day."

Loving isn't intellectual, loving doesn't require to do anything!
Anything.
no present,
no pondered attitude,
no preparation,
no cleanliness,

Loving is just being,
raw, blunt,
bared and naked.

(a renewed distance helps, to stay in one's brain, and observe unconditional feelings)