"I am dying inside"

I have the impression that any man that will touch you, you will feel something, like you suck on his emotion, that means he goes to you so you give him back his own emotion that you took and you end up desiring him back, you take the emotion of others and apply it to you. i won't feel anything if a girl i'm not attracted to touches me, i stay true to my own feeling and if i'm not attracted then i can't feel anything. but what do you feel really, as yourself, don't you have taste, values, opinions, morals, traits you like and traits you dislike, things you'll do and won't do, it seems you get over all this just because the other takes interest in you and you're so craving for relations, any sort of relations, that you copy his emotions, if he wants you then you give yourself to him.