Fragments of hatred

(music)

A need to find some worth in me, a need of intimacy,----- i should have said to those eyes they were pretty to me, ----i've said it so many times,----i speak,---- i try,---- i speak by periods, ----they don't last thirty seconds in reflection,---- makes me question what i know, if what i take interest in can really be shared, ----is that too random,---- or too much personal,---- too much intimate,---- most can't follow, most are affraid to follow me there,---- intellectually i'm kind of a freak but i feel proud of that, physically... always that fucking unbalance, i keep sweeping and turning that dogma i'm trying to create for myself, but the unbalance is growing up,---- i know i'm a jerk,---- i'm as discrimatory as anyone, ----maybe worst even,---- i said ninety percent of girls i see are vain and supercifial to me, ----did i really said unashamedly, ----i'm thinking about a lobotomy, because i'm affraid to die,---- i must deserve where i am,---- i'm still tied to one last string, one leash held by the great puppeteer named "self disgrace" dwelling in my mind,---- i still don't know where's my place, maybe i'm the only one in that niche, ----all i have to do, easily, is let someone in,---- let someone in,---- cut that last string, drop the judgments, and let the unsteady ones in,---- to limp in the light and bear firmly the stones, the crooked smiles, lift the chins up with the tip of one finger,---- there's nothing else to do for now, but where's my time,---- melting,---- oh courage don't leave me, it's the hardest moment, ----i'll sell off my poor old bones for one more share of wisdom, or a simple knife for my chest,---- while the world rolls baffled, i'm the victim of a foolish cult,---- i watch my speckled skin, the tension, the thin muscles i want to keep, the shivers and the crave, the sincere loving, the foretold changing to find another niche more frequented, ----"you want to make yourself ugly",---- don't criticize, i just want to find a place, if among something else because that's what i am and i should stop pretending, stop fearing, stop dreaming, stop growing, stop hoping, stop thinking, stop, stop, stop, STOP ------------------------------ feeling.



for no one



Moore - spinning goodbye