How you talk to a boss from a big company is subtly different than the way you talk to the janitor. You don't talk to a child like you do with an adult. Why? Because you play roles. When you enter a store to buy something. when you go to a restaurant, to the bank or to the post office, you play pre-established roles. You become a customer and express and act as it. And the vendor (clerk) or waiter, who equally plays a role, will probably treat you as a customer. A whole range of conditionned schemes of behaviors are set between two human beings which define the nature of the interaction. In place of human beings, it's mental images interacting one another. The more people are identified to their respective roles, the more the relations are untrue (fake).
Not only you have a mental image of who is the other, but also a mental image of who you are, related particularly to the person you are interacting with. So, you don't interact with the person at all, but who you think you are is in relation with who you think the person is, and inversely. The conceptual image that your mind created of yourself is in relation with its own creation, that is with the conceptual image that he created of the other (person).
And because the mental of the other person probably did the same, each interaction between two persons is in reality an interaction between four conceptual identities of the ego, which are in the end only fictions.
It's not surprising that there are so many conflicts in human relations. There's no real relations.
Eckhart Tolle (raw translation)
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