The problem is to be too much centered on oneself, when talking to someone, not noticing if the person appreciates us, because our brain is more occupied to self judgment and projections, to search what we are doing wrong, instead of truly listening and being interested by the other, and so be able to read the signs he sends.
This functioning is negative because people want to be noticed, and often in life it's general : "we like those who like us", so i say we have to learn to watch and listen the other, genuinely be focused outwards.
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