Slowly

I'm slowly falling to the state of poverty. The metallic curtain in my room broke down. My brother opened the wall to check what was going wrong, then he ragingly punched a hole in the shutter with a screwdriver. Everything is left apart on the floor (pieces of glass, shreds of wallpaper, and chips of paint). I get picked for my carelessness, and peaceful attitude.

The kindest and most harmless of people keep grudges against each others, they violently reject when they are alone in the intimacy of their appartment and frightened heart, irritated by irrational thoughts on common events (like the rain, time, comfort, and appearance), and they blend apathetically when they sporadically get together, not saying what they feel, clinging to their negativity in silence. Where is friendship.

You blame yourself for the faults you see, in your lack of confidence, then you blame it on others for you doubt they accept you with those faults in the unconscious mind process that dictates : "how could they accept me if i myself already reject and are disgusted by what i sense of myself." We have our own perception, it's different for everyone, i, personally, focus on the positiveness, i'm on that way, i'm sometimes clumsy in my speech but i'm never malevolent, never, don't you trust me?, don't you hear it, the words and smiles of unconditional acceptance.

I welcome my mother openly with positivism, when she comes ten minutes every two weeks.

I went a long way from resentment, from escaping responsibilities, and if i learnt one thing that i want to be, it is to have faith in positiveness, to trust myself that i will be kind and caring in my opinions and beliefs, to be conciliatory and never search conflicts, i vow to be good to myself and everyone else.

So many people, and everyone is good at heart, settle for negativity when they are scared, they often don't recognize this in them, so they attack anything and anyone around like wounded animals, and they hurt themselves and others, how can i open their eyes and make them understand that they have the strenght to take over their responsibility without that be a suffering, in calmness and positivism, in the present moment.

My friends can hurt me, if i'm affraid of one thing it's the contagious negativity spread throughout humanity, so i progress, and i learn, and i want to love, everybody at their state of consciousness,  even as low as it can be, trust yourself in positivity and let's spend that time together in self created joy, that then becomes restlessly awakened, everyone in their body, our own smiling entity, that we can then share with others, why boiling inside when it's so liberating to let go and embrace life. Just try with me.