mercredi 29 avril 2009
Beware the fanciful desirs!
If we feel sad sometimes it's because we lack something, we express the sadness through writing, tears, hurting ourselves etc ... and it feels good at the time but does not solve the problem, the thing we lack can be different every time and reappear to torment us; we must learn to identify what need cause the suffering, then either fulfill it and gain an ephemeral peace, or strive to gain the capacity to change our point of view and relativize (if we can't have what we love just be able to love what we have), reasonning ourselves because our needs are impossible to satisfy definitively; Our needs are inextinguishable, new ones constantly reappear, the road to happiness will be to satisfy our renascent needs each new day. Woe on those with utopian needs.
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" 'There' is no better than 'here'. When your 'there' has become a 'here', you will obtain another 'there' that will again look better than your 'here'. Don't be fooled by believing that the unattainable is better than what you have." - Rule 6 of Being Human
RépondreSupprimerI've been pondering this thought too. We feel sad when we can't satisfy our needs. There are many reasons why one can't satisfy his or her needs: 1. That need is unattainable (in which case perhaps the desire is set to an unreachable goal) 2. That need is overridden by other needs that are more immediate and necessary 3. He/she believes that need is wrong or "bad" and tries to stop craving it (in which case self punishment comes into practice) 4. The need requires assistance of another person (who could be absent in one's life, or not care enough to satisfy that need for him/her, or one cannot find the strength to ask for help)
I've found that ignoring needs and trying to be content when something is lacking causes me to run away from problems, which does not work because no matter how fast or far I run away I will never escape those unsatisfied needs unless I learn to fulfill them.
If your desirs involve others you have to also consider their needs and you have to ask others their opinions, just exposing what you want, words are here for that, communications between human beings, no need to be affraid or shameful of your desirs if your really feel them strongly, if they are really in you, just talk to others, don't impose your needs but share them maybe somebody will reply positively, if your words are respectful you won't be rejected badly. Also i think the one who's able to change is point of view at his own will possess the keys to happiness and can always see the bright side of any situation he's in. I think it's possible, we must find it in ourself to really believe it.
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